Caveman Summit: Question #1

The long arm lady had me sit near the front of the room to wait for the first question at the CAVEMAN SUMMIT. I had a few minutes and had nothing better to do than listen to those around me.

A conversation drifted my way from a table where a few women, with herring bones stuck in their assorted Texas sized hairdos, were seated.

"Cheetah, just isn't her color."

"And, did you see her leopard shoes?"

"I know! I only wear Louie Bitten with the red fox soles."

"Oh, me too!"

"I wonder how old that fossil bag is? I wouldn't be caught dead with one."

The long arm woman noticed my listening to these girls and said, "That's the 'savage girl' table."

Remember the tomatoes no one was eating? The tomatoes began to be tossed through the air by a man dressed in a burlap sack emitting a smell of onions, and landed in the faces and hair of these savage girls.

The long arm woman said, "We don't put up with them."

Nice.

The girls sat there with their arms crossed rolling their eyes, sporting the new ketchup look.

Long-arm lady made the announcement for the panelists to come forward. Interesting enough two of the panelists were the burlap sack man and a savage girl who still had tomato stuck in her herring bone. A third was the hairy, ogre handed man, the fourth was a tall elderly woman with hair dyed the color of an eggplant and wearing cheetah skin. They were introduced respectively as: Wallaman, Cyprus, Ernie and Baba.

It came time for the questions and I read the first aloud: Ancient man/woman painted hieroglyphics to leave something of themselves behind, what do you think modern man/woman is leaving behind and will be known for?

The entire conference room erupted in conversation and laughter until iron-pumping Ernie stood up and yelled, "Silence!" and then went on to say, "Humph, they will leave behind aluminum cans, plastic and diapers making it seem that was their food, their clothing, their everything."

He would be their environmentalist. Didn't see that one coming.

Wallaman went next, "Without a doubt modern man/woman will be viewed as stupid and non-thinkers. The thinkers would be recognized as becoming non-existant with the mainstream use of technology at the turn of the century and letter writing all but ceased."

A woman in the audience yelled out, "Ever since my son got a cell-phone he texts day and night--he held a party at our cave and texted me to bring down more grub for his friends."

"Girl, get rid of the cell phones and stick to the stone tablets." Cyprus said this and then began to refer the woman to the best stone tablet maker available when another man called out:

"They live with a Send-Read-Delete mentality."

I thought they were being a bit harsh until I remembered a seminar I attended with Robert McCullough as the speaker. He is the author of 1776. He spoke on the importance of journal writing. He said "If you want to become famous--keep a journal--and it will probably end up in the Library of Congress. It will be the only one."

Baba stood up, her shimmery purple hair flowing around her, and the room went quiet.

"I, myself, do not want to die and leave nothing but scraps behind. I had a hard time understanding the youth from my time, let alone modern time. The simple, yet memorable stick figures I painted of my grandchildren and children are still preserved in my cavern. Even my wolfhound, Aargh, and my cat, Beetles, are still lovingly displayed forever."

That comment left much for me to think on.

I wonder if future man/woman would know what to do with my CD's loaded with my family photos: glimpses of our precious time together, our love for each other, our moments of happiness and laughter, my children's faces from babe to high school graduation to first love and last love.

Maybe they won't know what to do with my CD's, but I can write in my journal and describe my daughter's coned head when she was first put in my arms and how that head became covered with blond locks to her waist; how she hit her forehead when she was learning to walk and the mark remains today and how she became hard headed as a teenager.

Question #1 made me realize the importance of a journal and the need to have an honest piece of my mind left behind. The caveman did it; it was really that simple!