On Weddings and Writings

As I try to find time to both plan a wedding and continue my normal writing schedule, I find something has to give. So far it's been sleep. I also find that as I try to write my mind is focused on everything but writing. I'm sure all writers have days, or weeks of scanty focus.

Yesterday, in the middle of a day of mind wandering, I received another rejection from an agent. Ouch! Nothing like a rejection to make ones mind do a 360. So I decided to pull weeds. Weed pulling after a rejection? Priceless!

I walked outside among the trays of orange, yellow and red blossoms I had planted for the backyard reception and discovered at least a third of my blossoms had been replaced with scanty stems. WHAT? Among the barren stems were slender trails of what appeared to be snot. My flower beds had been the host of a massive snail party. I pictured them texting all their buddies and their buddies texting all their buddies to slither on over to a freshly planted smorgasboard.

THIS WAS WAR! And, I wasn't about to kill my dogs with snail bait so...

I got my Mac gun and loaded my Google ammo and discovered snails like beer. Hmmm. I decided to give them a party they would never forget.

Now let me first inform you that I'm not a drinker. Nor have I ever bought beer. I picked up my son from his Driver's Ed class and we marched over to a gas station where I didn't think I would see anyone I knew.

We walked in to get my beer and I saw my neighbor, who is one of the only people I know who had 3 of their children at one time serving a Mormon Mission. She was filling her car with gas and I hope she didn't see me ducking and hiding and carrying the largest can of beer I could find with my 15 year old son in tow. The can was the size of a small trash can. But this was war and people do things they can't be held accountable for, right? After all, it's not like I was going to drink it.

I decided I needed to inform people of the fact that I was in fact not going to drink this gynormous can of beer. I waltzed up to the counter, set the small trash can down, and said, "This is my first time buying beer." What? Why did I say that? I sounded like an idiot. The two ladies at the counter looked at me with both their heads cocked sideways.

I had to follow with, "Snails like beer and I plan on getting them all drunk and drowning them in it." I gazed around to see if my neighbor had walked in to hear my announcement. She wasn't there, but plenty of other people were and they were all staring at me. I don't think I care to know what they were thinking. Obviously the two ladies behind the counter were well versed in selling liquor and had this look that said, "yeah whatever woman."

I paid and my son grabbed the bag and we left. I realized of course what that looked like.

After we set up our half-buried plastic cups and went to bed I couldn't wait to see what we would discover in the morning.

Call me heartless, but oh the satisfaction! Sure enough a couple of the cups had snails that got so drunk they drowned. About a foot away from the cup was a pile of snails that looked like they had had a great party and had a hangover. Of course, I've had to keep my dogs away from lapping up the concoction, but better a drunk dog than a dead one!

I hope my flowers can come back in time for my daughter's wedding reception!

Writers Conferences

What? No posts yet this year? Well, I best explain!

My daughter is getting married this summer! Yeah! Thus most of my extra time is going toward the planning of this little shin-dig. Between the dress, the photographer, the other photographer, the better dress, the bride-to-be's mental breakdowns, the three tier or two tier cake, and the: "Mom, instead of the reception center, let's use our backyard, because I've always dreamed of floating candles in the pool and yards of fabric and little twinkling lights draped across the gazebo and pergola," followed by my mental breakdown, just hasn't left much time for blogging!

But I've been able to keep my writing schedule of 4-6 hours a day and I've attended two writer conferences, the LTUE and LDStorymakers. At Storymakers I was able to pitch Shadowlight, and was told to send in my query. I have also queried other agents as well.

Not much detail in this post, but from a writer's life, this is the best I can do right now.

My daughter and I are picking up her wedding dress in an hour...I'll probably cry!

A Marry Merry Christmas!

Twenty-four years ago this week I had the most unique or unusual proposal of marriage of anyone I've ever spoken to. This proposal came at a place and time that exhibited the Holiday spirit, but not in the ways you'd think. In fact as I look back I still laugh and cry over the experience. And, I believe it's safe to say, it's a one of a kind proposal.

We were both in Los Angeles at that time. The weather was beautiful and warm and the beaches were perfect. The beach was where he first told me he loved me. We sat on a lifeguard tower at night. The moon shone bright. A red tide warning had been issued, which in the light of the moon made the tide glow turquoise green as it tumbled toward shore.

Shortly thereafter (Christmas Eve) he took me to Hill Street in Downtown Los Angeles, where we picked out my ring. I enjoyed doing this as a couple; walking around LA wasn't the most romantic of spots, but we picked out a sparkling diamond that he could afford and I wear it proudly.

It was then that the peculiar circumstances began to unfold, circumstances that I recognize now as a discovery of how much he truly loved me and how entertaining, unpredictable and joyful our future together would be and has been.

After purchasing the ring we walked to our parking spot, which was between two impressively expansive buildings. I could feel my husband-to-be's excitement. His eyes twinkled and he couldn't stop smiling as we drove down the alley towards the exit. But, blocking the alley stood a large garbage truck preparing to empty loads of trash into a gigantic dumpster in the alley. The kind of alley dumpster that CSI investigators pull out bodies.

Well, we couldn't back out so we waited, the little box containing the ring sat between us and Christmas music played on the radio.

I sat wondering that since we picked the ring out together and I knew what was coming, when would he put it on my finger and ask me officially? I decided to ask him. He grinned even bigger--if that was even possible--and he picked up the box and said, "How about now?"

I glanced nervously around. In front of us the garbage truck bounced the container upside down streaming the contents of days of discarded chicken, orange peelings, cans, whiskey bottles and carnage into the back of the garbage truck.

Next to me, a homeless man decided it would be a good time to unzip his pants and relieve himself as I yelled inside my head, "NO, OH PLEASE NO." A nice arching yellow, water stream began sprinkling against the wall of the building next to the car and my wide-open eyes.

Then, I felt a warm hand on mine, and I looked into the eyes of the young man sitting next to me...FULL of love and kindness and generosity. AND I realized how lucky I was! ALL he saw was me! MY face and our love for each other.

Never mind the smell of garbage tumbling down, never mind the man still spraying his waterfall on the wall, never mind that we weren't in a gloriously romantic setting on the beach or enjoying a candlelit dinner. The love of my life had all his thoughts on me. His total focus was on me, his future bride. What more could any bride ask for?

Today, as I think back to these humble beginnings, I'm reminded once again about the importance of blocking out those things that don't matter and concentrating on that which matters most. The man that I love and who I will spend the eternities with and the beautiful family that we've created together. What could be more in keeping with the Holiday Spirit than to have this as a primary focus during this time and always. I am truly blessed.

MARRY Merry Christmas!

Kids in College, Anyone?

We have two daughters attending a wonderful University up North. It's out of state and we don't see them often, but text or talk, every day (sometimes every hour) (twice, one of them called the home phone and one my cell phone--at the same time) They don't plan this.

They like to get our opinions on EVERYTHING, AND then NOT do any of our suggestions. This is all right, they eventually learn that our suggestions were actually good and they act on them, but, they have become THEIR suggestions by that point. Yep, they are becoming adults!

I like change, and have said so. But, when my phone rings and I see that it's one of my daughters, I cringe. Chances are they have changed their minds about something we spoke about only moments ago.

During the past week, Pip has wanted me to contact my sources and help her get a job at a child-care facility, informed me that she has an in for a job in a nearby city, that she wants to be a Nanny back East, be a nanny in Germany, get her job back at the shoe sales store, stay at school and work, AND during the last hour we received the following texts:

Pip: I’m going to apply for DisneyWorld
Us: Maybe you can be Donald Duck?
Pip: They have a college program that fits my track system and my roommate is applying too.
Us: You might make a better Goofy.
Pip: HaHa, Whatever. I am serious this time. I am applying right now! You told me to find a job. What’s a better place than the “happiest place on earth”?
Us: Sounds great.
Pip: I know! It’s kinda like a Study Abroad program cuz it’s Disney WORLD, but, you get paid!!
Us: We certainly can’t argue with that…

Oh, to be a college student, single and have your whole life ahead of you. I remember those days. I believe she is a lot like how I was. With that in mind I know she will eventually settle down. And in the meantime she will drive her parents crazy with the wonder of it all. I know I did.

Wiki or Library Card Catalog?

I have a love for libraries. I always have. The smell of books, the hunt for the just-right title, the organization of science fiction, mystery, thriller, philosophy, young adult to encyclopedias and how to's, all in the same room. Amazing! I am a book-worm and proud of it.

My husband and I knew from the start that we would have a library in our home, even before we heard the statistics from the influence of having one in the home. They encourage reading, learning and advanced education.

I remember when I had my first fling with a library. I was in Elementary school and our class was taken to the school library. I remember the shelves were tall and looked so massive and heavy with volumes of bright colored books.

The Librarian mentioned the "Dewey Decimal System" and in my young mind I instantly connected this to my Great-Grandfather who's middle name was Dewey.

"No Way!" I thought. And I knew...it had been MY great-grandfather who had come up with this brilliant method of cataloging books. It had to be him. The only other Dewey I knew could NOT have conceived this idea, all he did was hang out with his friends Huey and Louie.

I couldn't understand why everyone else in the class hated the Dewey Decimal System! I was very adamant that they should respect this system--AND I unabashedly told them why: Because my great-grandfather had developed it. I don't think that won me any friends, especially with the weird faces they pulled after I told them. I thought they were just jealous.

When I went to college I even USED the library. More often than not I put a pile of saliva on an area of a desk actually warped by many patrons doing the same thing as I, studying by osmosis. But, I did use it.

Libraries were fun places as well. At the close of the University library the theme song from Hawaii Five-O would play and it was customary for all the cool students still studying to stand up on the desks and chairs and hold out their arms and pretend to surf, many of them wiping off the string of saliva hanging from their chins.

Before writing this post, I received a call from my daughter who was searching for a book at the University library where she is attending. She said, "I don't even know what floor to start searching on!"

I laughed and told her it's not quite like using a search engine on the computer, she may have to use the card catalogue. She laughed back. Apparently card catalogues may have been replaced by computers. But, truth is, the Dewey system is still in use today, and you can do a quick search on your computer and Wiki will explain it pretty good!

Is Taking the Summer Off A Good Idea?

Well, I took the summer off, from blogging anyway, and worked on my manuscript. I hope the idea was a good one, but I'm not sure.

Today I pulled up my blog and beheld a caption stating "removed and deleted."

I had a momentary PANIC ATTACK until I discovered that my blog still existed, but sometime during the summer the image became changed and distorted because the template needed adjusting, due to the fact that there's now a fantastic and easy new design tool. I apologize for anyone who may have seen the ugly mess my blog had become!

I have also discovered that I have HOURS of CATCH UP! All the wonderful blogger friends I have been reading and now I feel totally out of the loop! I'm in need of a device for a fast download of all the blogs I have missed reading to go straight into my brain at the speed of light!

Not only am I feeling out of the loop, but I take the whole summer off from social networking and I'm still not done with the review and edit of my manuscript. But, I am close!

Maybe this is because of the vacation to Ouray, Colorado (It's hard to breath and people get irritated at 13,200 feet); or the vacation to Jackson and the Tetons(beautiful place to golf); or maybe because I enjoyed sitting by the pool (I could have brought my laptop out with me, but I'm positive the sun would have damaged it! I should have tried rubbing that SPF 100 on my computer, which is like covering it with a wool blanket, right?)


Maybe, it's because my two daughters are leaving for college on Monday and I just wanted to enjoy the time with them. And, as a family we have made memories and enjoyed guilt-free time together: cousins coming over, 50th birthday for my husband (nice red walker), bike rides and racing back home to see who's the most in shape (I'm not saying who won or lost), dancing with Jumanji (yes, our bird dances and works out).


Whatever the reason for my "summer off"--sometimes I just need a reminder that it's OK to keep things in balance, and for me, family always comes first! So, now that I'm not feeling guilty, I'll be diving in to the posts I've missed.

Male vs. Female: Characters and Real Life

It's been a few days since I returned home from the wonderful Casual Blogger Conference. I learned so much and hope I took enough notes to review so I won't forget all the knowledge I gained!

Fist bump to all the on-line friends I talked to in person, and to the new friends I made. You're all awesome. I loved reconnecting with friends I met at the LDStorymakers Conference as well.

I LEARNED SOMETHING AWESOME TODAY! Something I can definitely use in my novel writing, and I'm surprised I haven't clued into this before: Males and females TALK about DIFFERENT kinds of STUFF!

Yes, I know! It's rather uncanny. Here's how I gained this epiphany:

I grew up with tons of sisters, and 2 brothers. My brothers talked about, I really don't know, I never really paid attention. They were always in the basement or in their "hut" working with boxes and toilet paper rolls along with mud and concoctions of something called, STUFF.

The only time we girls paid attention to them was when something of ours went missing, like our Barbie car, or hair brushes, nail polish or other items we referred to as girl treasures.

IF we discovered the boys had taken, or even touched our girly treasures, we would punish them. We punished them hard and then we took proof. We made them sit for a makeup and hair makeover. See the proof? Isn't he cute. After this picture we nicknamed him Sassafras.



I'm now a mother of two girls and a boy, who is my youngest. He corners me with questions about dropping him and his buddies off in the mountains to camp (they are all 14 and 15 yrs old) or if he loaded up the trailer with all the motorcycles could I take them riding. And I generally tell him to go ask his dad.

For months his comments and questions have continued until I finally asked him why he always came to me with these questions instead of his father. He just stared at me, speechless. That's the moment I had my epiphany.

What did I expect him to ask and talk to me about? Questions about going to get a pedicure and a new pair of shoes? Or, Mom, guess who I like? Or, comments on how his friends and him all like the same girl, but he liked her first? And, do you know why he doesn't say these things? Because he speaks testosterone.

He's a young man now. I should have recognized this by the fact that he's taller than me and his voice has gotten rather low and irritating. In fact, his sister came home this last weekend from college and told him to not talk until his voice gets normal again. I remembered my poor brothers who grew up surrounded by volcanoes of estrogen. I can't even recall conversations we had other than, "Give that back or else" and many other lame threats.

This epiphany caused me to rethink how I have written my male protagonists and male characters, how they relate to others, and how their conversations sound. When writing we need to make sure to write conversations that are real and true to each character, whether male or female. If not, we won't have believable characters and we wouldn't want to disappoint future readers.

Many of the blogs that I follow have in depth information about writing believable characters. Please check them out, they are in my right sidebar.

I'm just getting ready to wrap up this post and my son just walked in. He's saying, "Mom! Do you think I'm gonna need stitches?"

Great...